Eid mīlad sa'aīd

There are many different customs and practises that take place in the world to mark the arrival of a new baby. From saving the top layer of your wedding cake for the Christening in Scotland, to tying a red string around baby’s wrist until the Christening ceremony and keeping the new-born indoors until then in the Ukraine. In China a party is held on the 100th day and gifts of money are given whilst in India a baby is not named until after it is 3 months old and the personality is clearer.

No matter what your beliefs, culture or nationality though the physical act of child-birth is fundamentally the same for all women. Working as a Doula in the UAE has allowed me to experience this first-hand. I have been fortunate to support a cross-section of women, from Irish to French, English to South African, and, just recently, a local Emirati lady. And whilst the physical biological process is similar the things that inspire and motivate my clients to push a little harder, and dig a little deeper, most certainly are not.

A gracious spirit

You have probably spent some time over the last few weeks watching at least one event from the Olympic Games, either in London live (lucky fish) or on TV like the rest of us. We have heard the term "Olympic Spirit" several times over the last few months, and I wondered, what is this thing called spirit that we talk about? Is it a personality trait, an attitude or something more intangible? Are we born with this thing or can it be learned?

I'm not sure that I am any closer to the answer, but i do think that we all know it when we see or experience it. And my last Doula client epitomised (for me in any case) what can only be termed a Gracious Spirit.

Cheryl's labour started around 21h30 and continued until 18h32 the following day. The body prepares for delivery in a number of, sometimes unexpected, ways (especially for first time moms). Part of this is a process of elimination where everything unnecessary is jettisoned, and this includes some vomiting in the final stages of labour. In Cheryl's case this phase lasted a lot longer than normal poor thing. I cannot stress enough the importance of staying well hydrated, and to eat small snacks in the early stages to keep energy levels up.

Hope whispers

There is a Japanese quote that states, "fall seven times, stand up eight". Sometimes just knowing what you want from life will keep you going, often in spite of yourself. As children we are taught that it doesn't matter if you win or lose, but how you played the game. I think as adults we come to realise that mostly it's not the winning, it's finishing the journey, that counts the most.

My most recent client, Jane, had always wanted a baby, and equally had wanted to have a natural, i.e. non-Caesarean, childbirth. She hired me as her doula during her fourth pregnancy. Having lost her first baby at 26 weeks and having suffered a miscarriage during her second pregnancy she had managed to fulfil only part of her wish, eventually, with her 3rd pregnancy - her first child was successfully delivered via C-section during a managed birth, after being induced. Although a successful and happy outcome Jane always felt it was an unnecessary intervention and not what she had wanted. To say that she was now determined to have a VBAC (vaginal birth after Caesar), with minimal intervention, is probably an understatement. Of course I was also keen to do everything in my power to ensure she had an experience as close to her original intention as possible, a wonderfully different experience this time. Jane had come to the right place (in my humble opinion).